Adoption is always a responsible step, especially if the kid has some special needs requiring special assistance and care. If the adopted child is not a baby, it means that he or she might already have some fears and pains from the past, which should be cured. From my experience, I can tell the story of the eight-years-old anorexic boy’s adoption that was quite challenging and thought-provoking. However, he is worth all my efforts.
This adoption changed my family and life view of all my relatives. In the beginning, some of them had doubts if this procedure was a good idea. The reason for these doubts was their belief that the adopted kid might be too disobedient, unable to study and concentrate, etc. I was trying to persuade them that child’s behavior will depend on our communication and my efforts to show him that I want all the best for his personal development. After few months of adoption experience, my family started to be incredibly tolerant and respectful to my decision. They saw how devoted I am to the task to make the boy happy and tried to help me in all possible ways: from offering to bring him back from school to organizing common family weekends.
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The main problem the boy was experiencing was personal fear of social life, related to anorexia and nutrition, as well as a lack of self-confidence. His previous life was not careless and joyful: orphanage life must have been better than homeless life. However, of course, it could not be equal to a loving family. Loneliness and jeers of other children led this small human being to anorexia, which, as everyone knows, is rather based on psychological than physical problems. Therefore, it was a serious challenge for me. First and foremost, it was necessary to restore the nutrition of this child. At the same time, I had to erase all bad memories that made him suffer and be afraid of social pressure or anything else.
First of all, I was trying to spend as much time as possible. I was reading books for him, listening to music with him, playing inside and outside together, motivating him to allow himself to be joyful and feel free from fear. It was not easy. However, my efforts gave results. He opened his heart to me after two-three weeks. In my area, I was searching for the local institution where the kid could spend a few hours a week learning something useful and communicating with other children. After I have noticed that he likes drawing, I found drawing lessons that he could take three times a week. I also talked to school teachers explaining that this boy needs special care. Fortunately, new school did not bring many problems. My adopted kid did not make many friends. However, even those two he made proved that he starts socializing well.
Apart from socialization, I was also taking him to the doctor to stabilize his diet. After two months, the boy started gaining weight and eating relatively well. Both emotional and physical condition improved owing to my efforts. I think that I did my best to handle the situation and make the adopted kid happy. I assisted him with changing the nutrition, socializing with peers and my relatives, teaching how to draw, and inspiring him with love to life. Of course, I will continue giving him motivation and strength for the successful life in society. I want him to grow up as a happy, independent, free, and goal-oriented individual who knows what he wants and how to achieve it. I believe that we will be able to be as close as real parent and son even if the ties of blood do not connect us. A spiritual connection with love and understanding is the most important thing.
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